LIVE IN LOVE?! HAVE YOU GONE MAD?!
Is it possible to transform the dominant global culture – to replace its view of us as amoral bio-mechanisms - existing meaninglessly in a meaningless universe - with a view of ourselves as creatures of flesh and love - thinking expressions of a thinking universe? The truth is - I don´t know!
Is it possible to snap the dominant culture out of its trance of superficiality? Is it possible to expose its dream of a cybernetic humanity as a nightmare? I don´t know! But, as I have been saying, I believe that if we are going to try, if we are going to try to “seed” alternative cultures then the quality – the quality of consciousness – of those seeds (Tribes) is all important.
And for the quality of those Tribes to be truly, qualitatively transformational, we have to learn to live as siblings - we have to open to each other with the same unconditional embrace that many of us offer to our biological siblings - even though they might be very different from us.
And I believe this requires a great opening because most of have been conditioned into a very constricted way of being. We don´t consider it ´normal´ to love everyone. It´s perhaps OK for a (so called) music “star” to call out “I love you all!” at the end of a concert. But to love everyone in the supermarket, or on the train – now that would be odd!
If we take it further, and imagine a politician suggesting a programme of emotional education to enable people to Live in Love – we can imagine the public astonishment. “Is that politican on drugs?” “Has that politican gone mad?”
But in my opinion, to love everyone: to look gently and empathically towards everyone, to appreciate their uniqueness, and only want for them that they find their freedom and fulfillment – is ´normal´ and natural. See how children and animals love indiscriminately!
But how can I look kindly upon others, if I don´t look kindly upon myself – and let others look kindly upon me? How can I appreciate others´ uniqueness, if I don´t stand boldly and humbly in my own? How can I want that others find freedom and joy, if I am afraid of my own?
As I see it – the opening of the heart towards the world begins with the opening of the heart towards oneself. “Towards oneself”? The very phrase suggests the presence of two: of one-who-loves, and one-who-is-loved... It suggests that I can look upon myself – with this particular body, character, history, and cultural conditioning – and criticise or admire what I see.
Is that how it is? One way to find out: by looking! By “looking upon” myself. This vantage point has been given many names: consciousness, essence, soul, centre, self. This looking is the first, crucial step in understanding the Conscious Tribes Vision – because it leads to the realisation that sits at the heart of the whole Conscious Tribes Vision for personal and collective transformation. And that realisation is this:
That when I look upon myself in utter, naked honesty – when I really face the mirror - when I really face my self-judgements and lack of self-love, and how ungenerous I am with my empathy, and how “normal” I have become – when I really face the flimsiness of my dearmost beliefs – when I really face the fact that nobody else is responsible for how I feel, or the choices I make – when I really face the earth and the sky and time, my aloneness, and how little I face myself – I see that: I only have my own unique experience of any moment. All realities might be interconncted - but I am in my own! I call this realisation “Radical Honesty”.
ONE REALISATION TO BOND US ALL
In Radical Honesty I see that (even if I feel inseperably part of everything) I am perceiving through my senses, evaluating with my mind, feeling with my heart – and I see everyone around me (even if I feel We Are One) as experiencing the same moment differently – through their senses, mind and heart. I realise that my experience is unique – that nobody else, anywhere, is having exactly the same experience as me.
This might not be true for you. This might not be a realisation that makes sense to you. And that, of course, is fine. But let me say now that this realisation is at the heart of the whole Conscious Tribes proposal. In other words, Conscious Tribes are not just empty baskets into which everyone can bring their faith, or lack of faith (like in the image at the end of chapter one). Yes, in that image it indicates that any and every belief system can fit into the Conscious Tribes approach (and it can) – but underneath the image are the words “everyone has their unique, subjectve experience of the indefinable moment”. One realisation to bond us all!
In other words... someone might come to the Conscious Tribe as, let´s say, a Taoist (believing Taoism to be the most subtle, simple and beautiful of all paths), and someone else might come as an Atheist (believing Atheism to be the most honest, noble and courageous of all paths). But both come (and everyone else comes) having realised, individually, for themselves, that I only have my own unique experience of any moment.
This is not a philosophical statement. It is not “nobody has anything other then their own experience”. It is not a statement about other people, or about what is and isn´t possible. It is a purely personal realisation. It is a statement about what one feels to be true - about oneself.
And The Conscious Tribes invitation, or proposition, is that this realisation (1) will hold them together as a Tribe, (2) take them into deeper and deeper intimacy as they explore it together, and practice relating from it, and (3) temper and mature the ways in which they hold their beliefs.
And also that, from this one realisation, a whole series of other realisations will follow... We begin to feel a deep equality with everyone. Seeing others as inside their unique story, we sense our sameness in two ways: that “we are one” in the sense that our Essences are One – that One Consciousness is Manifesting as Many - and secondly, in the sense that we are all in the same existential situation. We are all experiencing subjectively – through our limited, conditioned bodies, hearts and minds.
We begin to feel that of course we are all siblings - biological and non-biological siblings. We feel our own present moment. We feel the Mystery of Our Own Moment. And we feel the perhaps-infinite Mystery of which we are part. We feel We Belong. We feel that of course One Realisation bonds us all! We feel we are part of The Family of All Life! And we begin to become less “normal”: we begin to feel a non-sentimental, non-romantic Universal Love for everyone, for all other creatures, and for Existence Itself.
At the same time, as we settle more and more deeply into being-with our experience (rather than being swept away by it) – a whole parade of “interferences” comes to our attention. We see how our judgements, angers, fears and shames create “interferences” that make it difficlut, sometimes even impossible, for us to stay-with our actual experience. And there is the challenge! There is the Path of The Conscious Tribe!
When we first realise that we only ever experience our own experience, because we´re being honest with ourselves, we also realise that most of the time we don´t “experience our experience”. We realise we don´t feel our belonging to the Great Mystery... while driving the car, or in the office, or at the factory, or at home, or on the street... We realise that we live, generally speaking, listening to the soundtrack of the mind - in for the most part, a quite numb, mundane state. And so, again: there is the challenge! There is the Path of The Conscious Tribe!
ONE PRACTICE TO BOND US ALL
So The Conscious Tribe proposal is not a vague, relativistic (anything goes), new-agey mishmash of angels and candles, with a touch of therapy - and a sprinkling of eco-self-sufficiency! It is a specific path, rooted in a specific realisation – even if, in my opinion, it is a universal realisation requiring only honesty.
The members of a Conscious Tribe are bonded in their realisation that they each only have their own experience of any given moment. They are therefore bonded in humility, in equality, and in mutual respect. They are not focussed on judging or analysing or therapising each other. They are focussed on themselves – together. They are bonded on the Path of Radical Honesty.
And as I have been saying, consciousness brings unconsciousness to light. The commitment to presence reveals our absence. The realisation of our equality exposes our feelings of superiority and inferiority. The aliveness and joy we share as a Tribe highlights the cut-offness and dullness with which we go through our days...
So how to keep the Tribe on the Path? And how to keep deepening and opening? Whatsmore, when we come together to become a Conscious Tribe each person brings knowledge, skills, resources, ideas, preferences, prejudices, resistances, ego, needs they´re aware of, needs they´re not aware of, and so on – which can result in people pulling in different directions...
In this book I´m going to be making recommendations to help Conscious Tribes come together and bond, and begin travelling together. But I want to be absolutely clear that I am only offering these recommendations as starting points.
Above all, I am going to be recommending that the Tribe engage with the silent-and-talking meditative-practice of Conscious Relating. The Practice of Conscious Relating begins by bringing each person´s attention to their own, unique experience - and to an awareness of themselves as being both an individual and part-of-everything. The Practice then becomes a “meditation for two" - and then a meditation for the whole Tribe. We learn to meet, and be open to each other, while staying-in our own, unique experience.
I feel it is an exquisite Practice - involving not only silence, but also conversation. And I believe it is an absolutely excellent way of evolving the Conscious Tribe - because it´s a relational meditation. It's not like Buddhist meditation, for example (which I don't mean to put down in any way) - which is individualistic. (Buddhism itself is not, ultimately, an individualistic tradition, of course, because it returns us to our Oneness.) But it suggests an individualistic way of meditating. You sit in meditation alone. Whereas Conscious Relating is about meditating in openness to each other - and learning to relate to each other in that openness - from Essence to Essence, through our personalities...
The Practice of Conscious Relating is designed to help us live in a connected consciousness – not just to feel connected when we meditate, but to be able to hold conversations, and engage in practical tasks – and stay in that state of connection. After all, we´re talking about Conscious Tribes being microcosms of the Conscious Cultures we want to co-create!
I have developed and refined The Practice of Conscious Relating over many years, and I imagine you´ll agree it is an extremely appropriate, relevant Practice for a Conscious Tribe. But I offer even this Practice as a starting point – as a way of experiencing what it´s like to meet and relate from within our own experience – as a way of tasting that present and intimate energy field, immediately, together.
Then, after a while, if you want, you can adjust the Practice in ways you feel better meet your needs. I call this approach Flexible Form (and talk about it at the end of the chapter “Tribe Gatherings, Recommendations”) - neither adhering rigidly to a pre-established form, nor flitting from one form to another, and deepening into none.
I feel it is important to appreciate this approach from the beginning. Not “we are doing The Practice of Conscious Relating because it is the way to evolve a Conscious Tribe”, but “we are doing The Practice of Conscious Relating, and feeling how it feels...” If we just repeat an established format we put ourselves in the position of “followers”, which is not a very empowered position! Not only that, but the format can quickly lose its life, and become formulaic. Whereas if we´re trying out a Practice, and evaluating it for ourselves, we are in an empowered position, with freedom of choice – and it stays alive.
I will be making other recommendations too. But if there is “one realisation to bond us all” - the realisation that “all I ever experience is my own, limited, subjective, unique experience” - then (at least at the beginning, while the Conscious Tribe is forming and finding its way) I´d say there is “one Practice to bond us all” - The Practice of Conscious Relating – a Practice we repeat again and again (because we´re practicing!) - in order to gradually become more powerful in our committent to “experiencing our experience” than the many-and-powerful forces that are continuously pulling at us (from within and without) inviting us back into unconscious disconnection.
The Practice of Conscious Relating opens us to the Wonder of the Moment, and to Universal Love. And it is an experience we can "duplicate" - with anyone who´s willing! So you might not have formed your ConsciousTribe yet - but you can already practice it with friends, with your biological family, and with people who live locally – and, who knows – maybe your Conscious Tribe will form itself around you!
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Mark Josephs,
"Mark the Mystic Activist"
Aragon, Spain
Summer, 2024
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